The Yearly Reset: do ADHD girlies even need to bother?🤔
it's the most wonderful time of the year to just chill tf out, actually
It happens year after year after YEAAAR — to me, but to you, too, I bet.
I wake up after the holidays are over with that strong and very distinct urge to “get my whole life together” for *insert new year here*
Now, I’m always feeling a mess while wishing that I wasn’t, but this “annual reset” is different, isn’t it?
A lot of us are off work or out of school, and we might even have a few days before anyone really expects anything of us again, right? Why not set some goals and maybe do a quick purge of the closet or the kitchen cupboards, right? Easy!
Sure, if you don’t have ADHD, maybe…
For US, Winter Break is NEVER aaactually a break…
If you DO have ADHD, however, you know that the last week of the year isn’t a time to “unwind and get cozy” — it’s a time to stitch yourself back together and crawl (once more) into your cocoon of numbness and isolation!
Because while all the added shopping, socializing and traveling of the holidays tends to take a toll on everyone, the average ADHD girlie, already perpetually over-stimulated, over-committed, and just generally overwhelmed, has likely just crammed 2 months of holiday season prep work into about 72 hours.
And thus, despite our highest hopes and best intentions, we’re doomed to spend this time, not preparing and making headway on the upcoming year, no! — but “recovering" — which is to say: doomscrolling, bed-rotting, and eating Doritos for dinner.
Just me?
“Dark Night of the ADHD Brain, Episode 897 (aka every night of my life)” by Danielle Colada
break’s over, b*itch.
Adding insult to injury is the fact that, just about the time you’re ready to take that time for yourself and at least try to get everything together, you’re forced to rejoin polite society!
School’s back in session, your boss probably wants your Quarter 1 something-something report on their desk tomorrow, etc. — and so, you push back your reset.
First by just a day or two (nbd, who cares), then it’s a week (meh), and next thing you know, it's JULY — and your social media feeds are filled with That Girls successfully completing their mid-year resets when you never even started on your initial new year one. 🙄
Now I’m not here to make you feel bad, but the characteristic ADHD time-blindness that probably led you to put off all your Christmas shopping, and by extension your reset, is honestly just the tip of the iceberg.
What’s hidden beneath the surface goes so deep, and is something I think most neurotypicals struggle to even understand:
just how OVERWHELMING, AT ALL TIMES, EVERY SINGLE PART OF YOUR LIFE can become when the executive functioning skills that make life generally manageable for most are SRSLY impaired in your brain.😩
And so, while it would be wonderful to just set aside an hour or two, set some goals, do some dusting, maybe make one quick drop-off at the local Goodwill and call it a day, the “fix it list” for YOUR mental mess is SO. MUCH. LONGER — PARALYZINGLY longer, in fact, and so you stay stuck.
After all, who’s going to get excited about setting goals for this year when you can’t help but FIXATE on how they’re the exact same goals from last year?
Who has the ENERGY to declutter the closet, the vanity, your desk, your pantry, your garage, and everything in between?
It’d be difficult as it is — but after weeks of shopping, stress-eating, shit sleeping, traveling, and playing “family” with distant relatives who honestly feel like complete strangers?
Now factor in inevitable distraction and paralyzing indecisiveness…
*EXHALES DEEPLY*
😩😩😩
I think I’m good this year, actually.
I’m good on more stress, I’m good on more guilt.
I’m older and wiser and ready to accept that my ADHD means I’m not on everyone else’s timetable and THAT’S LITERALLY FINE.
I’m gonna be nice to myself and let myself hibernate if that’s what I need. (sidebar: who invented Jan 1st as “new year” anyway, it’s literally the dead of winter)
My to-do list will be there.
The employees at Goodwill probably don’t want me showing up with a trunkful of junk anyway.
And a depleted Danielle is of no use to anyone.
I think ‘tis the season to just f*cking relax...
(but ask me again come Spring😅)
<3